trollpolice.com

I am going to focus most on what a cyber-stalker will do and how they likely will react. For the most part, a cyber-stalker is no different than someone stalking you in person. Usually their motive is personal. Whether they’ve grown an infatuation or obsession through meeting you online or in person (sometimes both), they are usually following and harassing you for a personal agenda.

Usually they are fixated on a delusional idea of you, resentful of your rejection, infatuated or jealous/bitter. From experience, their first approach is by creating a new identity and becoming apart of the community where you are a member. They will often post in areas that you have interest in and create a fake persona of the type of person you might be attracted to. Eventually, they will contact you, through PM, IM or email.

I personally have made the mistake in trying to rationalize with a cyber-stalker and help them overcome their issue. DO NOT, and let me repeat, DO NOT assume you can befriend a person of this mentality and solve the problem so that everyone can “just all get along.” It WILL NOT work. The best thing you can do is tell them to leave you alone and get it out there that this person is harassing you. Keep every shred of evidence you have. Although on a cosmetic level it might appear they can supply “evidence” to prove otherwise, I promise you what you can show by keeping emails, PMs and other logs is refutable.

Upon discovery of who they really are and their intentions they will immediately deny they are harassing you. I have dealt with 4 cyber-stalking cases (one of which was mine). And because of my straight forwardness and lack of fear of exposing, their initial reaction is denial. Then, eventually after you have made it publicly clear what is happening they will attempt to turn the facts and paint it as you harassing them. I have even seen cases where the stalker has taken any email and/or PMs they might have exchanged with you and pasted them on personal blogs… changing the words around and their responses to make it appear as if you were bothering them. I can say this is typical because the 3 out of 4 I have busted, did this to me and two other victims. If this happens, contact the hosting provider and report the abuse. Offer any evidence you have if they require it.

However, do not let this frustrate you. You’re the one with the physical evidence that cannot be copied and pasted. It’s easy to forge a copy and paste job, but its very difficult to deny server logs, actual emails with their IP attached and built in IM logs that are impossible to change. Not to mention, you have the community to vouch for what actually took place, and if it was severe enough, you were smart enough to involve other people. DO NOT BE ASHAMED TO GET HELP. One potential way to stop the stalking is by publicly announcing your problem and getting others involved to help you.

If you feel you are physically threatened, immediately contact the authorities. I cant stress this enough.

It’s been our experience that unless you are active in doing something about a stalker, the person will not stop harassing you. Unless, they come fixated on someone else. However, if their focus on you is personal that is unlikely to happen. Besides, letting a stalker abuse other people is not something we want to happen anyway. Hence this wonderful site.

But at all cost, after the initial “leave me alone” — do not engage with them any further. It’s tempting to tell them off, and I have made this mistake myself… but just don’t do it. That’s what they want. Any attention they can gain from you, be it positive or negative.